A 4 year-old little girl was overheard reciting the Lord’s Prayer, “and forgive us our trash cans as we forgive those who pass trash against us.” Out of the mouths of babes!
Cute story but it did get me to thinking. I always thought I had “emptied my trash can” of my sins before the Lord in repentance. What I have not done is empty it of self-condemnation, not completely. I hold that trash can lid on tightly and as a result am not able to let go of the shame of past mistakes that honestly, I, nor anyone else even remembers. Much less God! These memories hang on like some ugly monster and as much as I would like to move forward in “total” forgiveness, I just can’t muster the courage to scare that ugly monster away.
While my trash can contains junk from other people, my self-condemnation for some of the past decisions I’ve made, or the things that I’ve done, and the brokenness experienced because of my choices, in my heart, I’ve accepted the forgiveness of Jesus. Just can’t seen to forgive myself. I do self-loathing very well! Forgiving yourself is certainly not easy!
It must stop! I am working very hard to let the stubborn, strong, unconditional love of God pry my fingers from the lid of my trash can. I will empty every last condemning voice once and for all! After all, none of us are perfect, just perfectly forgiven in Christ.
Psalms 103; 11-14 – For his unfailing love toward those who fear him is as great as the height of the heavens above the earth. He has removed our transgressions as far away from us as the east is from the west. The Lord is like a Father to his children, tender and compassionate to those who fear him. For he understands how weak we are; he knows we are only dust.