All Parts Belong

In February, I designed a challenge for myself: do a cold plunge at Sanders Beach, photograph my plunge as reference for a watercolor painting, recreate the scene in watercolor, and finally write a poem to capture my thoughts of the day: plunge / paint / poem. 
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I loved the challenge so much, I didn’t stop when February ended. I am still going (though the lake has warmed up considerably). I just hit 90 plunges, paintings, and poems!

Aly Prades

I recently read back through many of my poems from the challenge, trying to select a few to read at my monthly in-person writing group. When I looked back at my words, I was a little embarrassed by some of them. I realized some were haphazard. Some, which I thought were profound, read back as cheesy, forced, and sentimental. Before this project, I used to share only the ultra-curated and edited; paragraphs I had read and re-read until I had the words memorized, until the piece felt not just right, but like the only way to say it. Only then was I ready to share with the world.

In sharing my writing every day (or most days), I'm showing that all parts are welcome: the good, the profound, the cheesy, the lackluster (and a lot of it has been feeling lackluster!). Even the days I don't plunge and paint, I've come to find acceptance there.

What started as a fun, creative experiment has become an exercise in self-acceptance. This project is the opposite of bespoke, letting whatever bubbles up be good enough. It's the opposite of AI: I use my own janky photography skills, clunky words, and novice painting to create something kindled by my own imagination.

Each day becomes a question: can I accept this day's output, with its varying moods and quality? Can I accept myself just as I am, every day?

I am learning that my ideas and words and art are worthwhile regardless of quality or excellence or how they are received. I am showing myself that my creativity is valuable in any state. I am valuable in any state because I am a child of God. ​

All of it belongs.

All of me belongs. And all of you belong, too. 

In His Name, Aly

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