Thirsting for the Lord

​Sometimes life can be so difficult. As humans, we know that on one level we will have joy and happiness but also pain and suffering. This is all part of our daily experiences and sometimes it is very hard to understand. We will lose loved ones, get bad news, become overwhelmed by anxiety, a myriad of other things that don’t make sense to us. As some of you may know I recently lost my beloved sister Annie to ​cancer. She put up a good fight and 

Ellen Taylor

fortunately made peace with her God before she left this world. When she passed she was wrapped in a Prayer Shawl made for her by the lovely ladies of First Pres. I gave it to her the last time I saw her and she loved it so much. I know that she is in a much better place now but somehow that hasn’t helped me process my grief any faster. I know about the stages of grief but knowing about them and making an effort to go through them is a different story. But, thankfully a very surprising thing happened to me recently that strengthened my faith in God.

One of the ways that I have been coping is by spending more time with my Bible. Especially the Psalms, which historically I didn’t read often, but I found that they were very comforting. A few weeks ago I read Psalm 42:1-2, “As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, my God.” The comparison of the weary, parched deer who longs for relief from his thirst by finding water and the feelings I have of being exhausted by my grief are similar. I, however, know in my heart that my answer is spending more time in the presence of God -- through prayer and by reading the scriptures. As I spent time contemplating God’s strength and love, I also prayed for a sign from Him to reassure me that He was there for me, that He understood my pain, and that he had my beautiful Annie in His warm embrace.
 
A couple of weeks ago I experienced an amazing thing which I felt was definitely a sign that God was there for me. I always feel closer to God when I am outside so, after absorbing the message of the Psalm, I went outside for a walk on our property. We have 5 acres so there is a lot of wildlife. There are deer, moose, raccoons, and many varieties of birds. My favorites are the California Quail who have been nesting and just hatched their flock of tiny fluff balls. I have been watching a group of 12 twelve chicks and two dutiful parents for a few days. It has been so fun to watch them grow. We also have two dogs, so the trick for us is to keep them from chasing the birds. I didn’t see the quail when I went outside, so I threw a ball for the Golden Retriever into some tall grass. As she raced after the ball there was suddenly a huge commotion. It appeared that I had inadvertently thrown the ball into the center of the flock. The parents were squawking, the babies were peeping and trying to fly but they were too little to get very far. I got control of the dog first and started to back slowly away, feeling terrible about what had happened and hoping that none of the chicks were injured. This is where it got interesting.
 
The parents were making a very distinctive noise that I think warned the chicks to stay put. Once quiet was restored and the chicks had settled down I started to go back to the house. But suddenly both parents came out of the tall grass and marched right up to me. As they stood side by side they were making a loud, threatening noise as if daring me to challenge them and I could swear that we made eye contact. These tiny birds were fearless. They would do anything to keep their flock safe. While witnessing this miracle of the wild, I suddenly felt a sense of peace come over me and I believe I felt God’s presence. As the parents continued to advance on the dog and me, we continued to back up. Only when we were a safe distance away did they turn around and return to their family. They made another type of noise once they reentered the grass and slowly led their flock to safety.
 
Thirsting after my Lord as I have been, I considered witnessing this miracle of nature my “proof” that God is here for me. He was definitely there for the little quail and allowed them to protect their flock. I can think of no other explanation for this heroic behavior. And He also allowed me to experience this remarkable situation. If God can be there for such tiny beings, He is definitely there for me. No matter how exhausted I am or what problems I am dealing with, the answer for me is always to turn to the Lord. Spending time in His presence is the only solution for me and I will continue to seek Him every day.
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​ “Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus” Thessalonians 5:16-18

“Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted”
​ Matthew 5:4

In His name,
​Ellen