Bless them. Change me.

Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Ephesians 4:2

This week a friend died. I’m sad. I’m angry. I’m not angry with the person, but rather the circumstances that led to this death … because I believe it could have been avoided. How could I know that specifically? I don’t.
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Janet Starkey

​Bless them. Change me.

Those four words have appeared several times this week, so I’m thinking I need to pay attention.

I want to ask this friend what led to decisions that likely ended with devastating consequences. Do I think that I’m owed an apology for a decision that has robbed family and friends of their company and a happy future life? Maybe. Because that bit of anger keeps rearing its ugly head. But that conversation can never take place. And, I’m quite certain I am not owed that explanation, curious as I may be.

Bless them. Change me.

So I have a choice. I can dwell in this hurt, or I can think back to Pastor Neal’s recent sermon that explored back stories. I don’t know the back story that led to this decision, and, truth be told, it’s none of my business. What I can do is remember this amazing friend and the gift of their life that I had the honor of enjoying. I can look inward to where I myself fall short and consciously focus my efforts on the only soul I can control: my own.

So bless them, Change me.

God, I’m here and I’m available.

In His Name, Janet